Sunday, May 26, 2013

By The Numbers

12 years is a long time. But this marriage has been the best, most exciting, most worthwhile thing ever. It has given me my children. It has opened doors and opportunities I might have been too afraid to go through with alone. It has become my labor of love.

And it's still a work in progress. 

You think after 12 years you know everything there is to know about a person. Well, I just found out that Hubster likes thin spaghetti noodles, when I thought he only liked regular spaghetti noodles.

There are still so many things I want to do with this man. Finish our education (come on, next two years.) Buy our forever house. Live through a renovation. Travel the world. See our children marry and have our grandchildren. 

I love you, Hubster.

Here's to 60 more anniversaries.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Half Birthday

6 months old today.

Eating solids.
Jabbers non stop.
Smiles at everyone all the time (people in the store, at church, on TV).
Blows raspberries.
Starting to scoot around on his tummy.
Wants to sit up and crawl, but isn't quite there.
Will not sleep on his back anymore.
Starting to copy his big brothers and hold his own bottle.
Still spits up quite a bit.
Loves his Sophie giraffe, carrots and sweet potatoes, peek-a-boo, and walks.
Dislikes having to hold still during diaper changes and peas.

Fastest 6 months ever.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Hanging On

That's what I've been doing lately.  Just hanging on.

Hanging on until spring came. And amazingly enough, just like every other year, it came. Despite freezing temperatures and snow falls in March and bare branches and brown, dead lawns and gardens in April it came.

Hanging on until residency is over.  I'm still waiting for that one, but it's coming, in a very slow, dragged out way, but it's coming.

Hanging on until Duck, and by natural extension, me, starts sleeping through the night again.

I keep thinking that I'm on top of things, that I can make time for everything.  For all the dishes and laundry and school activities and family time and studying and home projects and putting away the winter clothes and movie night and research projects and the over all big picture.  But I can't do it all.

I think I'm on top of it, and then there is a huge family crisis that has me rushing back to Utah to be with family.

I think I'm on top of it, and then I realize that there are just a couple months until boards and I'm spending every last second studying.  Listening to lectures while I drive. Flipping through questions while in line at the grocery store. Rushing to get the boys to bed so I can pull out the books and study until I fall asleep at the kitchen table surrounded by highlighters and flashcards.

I think I'm on top of it, and then I find myself doing 24 hour calls every third night and working 85 hour weeks and 15 straight days. And I'm just so tired and overwhelmed that I can't even fake a smile.

I think I'm on top of it until I realize that I'm busy and tired and overwhelmed and my boys are rapidly growing up around me and I feel a blind panic that I'm missing every thing important.

I know this is just a temporary phase.

Boards and residency will be over in July. There will be no more 24 hour or weekend shifts. Eventually the piles of laundry and the faint smell of unwashed dishes will be taken care of.

Until then, I'm hanging on.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Boy Mom

You might be a boy mom if... can name all the Transformers and if they are Autobot or Decepticon.

 ...your floors look like this... know the difference between Skylanders and Pokemon (but still don't let them play either one.)

...bedtime consists of pillow fights, sock wars, and having to smell each other's feet. know all the Star Wars characters (well, almost all of them.) are an expert on removing grass, mud, blood, and ketchup out of clothes. don't even notice the girls' clothing section.'ve never been down the pink aisle in the toy section. own more Legos than shoes, dishes, fancy dresses, or hair accessories.  Combined. know all the super hero's super powers, and why no one wants to be the Aquaman. have gone to the store with a child dressed as a dragon, Tigger, and Superman. wouldn't have it any other way.