Getting Fit(Bit)

I've mentioned in the past that I've struggled with my self image. Like so many other women, I've looked in the mirror and stood on the scale and been incredibly dissatisfied with what I saw.

I started running a couple years ago, and fell in love with it (which is something I definitely thought I would never say.) I started with Couch to 5K followed by Couch to 10K. Last fall, I ran my first 10K. Physically, it was one of the harder things I've ever done. Mentally, it was amazing! (Although based on how hard it was for me, it made me seriously rethink my life goals of running a half or full marathon.)

As much as I loved running, I always did feel a little discouraged that I didn't lose any weight.  Not a single pound. I felt like I was putting in all those miles to just barely maintain where I was. I told myself that the number on the scale and the size of my jeans didn't matter (because it honestly doesn't). I told myself that I was in better shape than I had been in years. My resting heart rate was lower. My stamina and energy were better.  I could keep up with my boys (and sometimes even out do them). Those were the things that really mattered.

But still, never seeing the number on the scale change was discouraging. Before having children, I was extremely thin, sometimes bordering on underweight. Pregnancy changed my body in ways I never anticipated. My metabolism ground to a screeching halt. I never regained my pre-pregnancy size, hanging on to 20 plus pounds with each pregnancy. My BMI went from normal to overweight. The last couple years, my BMI hovered just under obese. I was trying to eat healthy and exercise regularly, and just felt that I wasn't getting the results I had hoped.

My family has always been very supportive of my attempts to be healthy (and I always try to keep the conversations about being healthier, not about being skinnier and losing weight or feeling fat.) For my birthday this year, Hubster bought me a FitBit Charge HR. 

I'm sure most of you know about FitBit. It's a super fancy pedometer. The Charge HR also counts stairs, calories, and continuously measures heart rate. It also keeps track of sleep.  After a few days, I realized that in between my runs, I wasn't being nearly as active as I thought I was. So I started walking into work each day, instead of riding the shuttle from the parking lot. I started taking the stairs everywhere. I haven't been in an elevator since I started wearing the FitBit. It's motivated me to take more walks, run around the back yard with my boys, take extra laps around the operating rooms at work, and do whatever it takes to get my 10,000 steps and 10 flights of stairs each day.   It also has really helped motivate me to not skip my runs. I love those days when I get my steps in by 10 am, and everything else is bonus!

Also, being able to connect with other FitBit wearers and add that competitive edge has helped as well.

My resting heart rate, which was already fairly good, has gotten better, going from 65-68 to 60-62.

After talking to some friends, I also decided to try the app MyFitnessPal, to do some calorie counting. It was enlightening. And by enlightening, I mean a shock, slap in the face type of enlightening.

I felt like I was eating pretty healthy. And I was. I was just eating about double what I should. I remember the first two days of counting calories, and I was shocked by how much I was eating. I never felt like I was over eating, I never felt stuffed after meals, and I was eating fewer servings than the rest of my family. But for me, it was still over eating. Once I realized that, it was very easy to cut back. I still have pizza and ice cream and candy and bacon. But I just eat one slice of pizza and just one actually serving size of ice cream. I reach towards healthy, more protein based snacks. I'm not eating a specialized diet, I'm eating what the rest of my family is. I'm just eating a more appropriate amount.

The calorie counting was hard at first, but it's gotten so easy now (especially since I've added our favorite recipes to MyFitnessPal.) There are days when I go over, but most days I have a good feel for how much I can eat. By deciding to not eat off the plate of cookies at work, it means I can have a cocktail with Hubster that evening while we watch Outlander.

Between these two things, I'm not just feeling great, I'm losing weight. For the first time in years, I'm actually seeing the number on the scale drop. There is no more jumping up and down to get my jeans on.

So far, I'm down 10 pounds. My BMI has dropped two points, headed back towards a normal, healthy BMI.

I know it's not just about the numbers. There are so many reasons to take care of ourselves, to eat healthy and exercise regularly. But it's so nice to get that reward for taking care of myself.

Now, I just have to figure out what to do about my sleep. I've always known that I haven't slept well, and now I have the FitBit to prove it.

Running Shoes

My boys go through shoes at an almost unnerving rate. It doesn't matter the brand, the type, or the quality. Without fail, within 3 months, their shoese are falling to pieces. Holes at the toes, soles coming off, stitching unraveling, falling to pieces.

So, this weekend, right on schedule, I was shoe shopping with my boys.

Monkey insists on velcro, because stopping to tie shoe laces apparently slows him down and cramps his style.

We finally found a pair of sturdy looking, gym appropriate, acceptable style and color, velcro securing shoes.

As Monkey tried them on, his face lit up.

"These are perfect!"

He quickly slipped the second shoe on and started running laps around the display shelves.

"I'm so much faster, Mom!  Look how fast I can run in these! I'm even walking faster! I can't wait to go home and run on the treadmill and see how fast I can go now!"

I remember being a kid and having that same feeling, being so sure that my new shoes made me able to run faster, jump high, and be all around amazing.

To be completely honest, I'm not sure I'm over that feeling.

When I replaced my running shoes, I had that same feeling. These shoes were awesome, the cushions and fit were amazing. How could I not run faster in these shoes? 

I got the same feeling when I bought a pair of running socks. They were padded in all the right places, didn't bunch up in my shoes at all, and were breathable, so my feet were never sweaty. Of course I would run faster with these great socks!

When I got my compression running pants, yep, I got it, the same "now I can run faster" feeling.

As it turns out, despite all that fancy running gear, I'm still slogging through the miles at the same turtle stampede pace. Not one piece of running gear that I added took any time away.

Do I feel better running? Yes. My feet don't hurt or get sweaty. My running pants actually fit and I'm not stopping to adjust things mid run. The sweating wicking material is great for so many reasons.  But am I faster?  Not at all.

But am I going to tell Monkey that his super cool, awesome, new shoes won't make him run faster?  Never!

10K Accomplished

This weekend, I accomplished another one of my running goals and completed my first 10K. 

Granted, I generally plodded along and had to walk up the hill that was present at mile 5. But I finished, with an official chip time of 1:07:28.

It's not fast, but I'm proud of that time. A 10K isn't super long, but I'm proud of the distance. Last summer, when I first started running, I didn't think there was any way I would make it to this point. After all, last summer, when I started the Couch-to-5K program, I could barely run for a minute at a time.

I've run a few 5Ks in the last year and thoroughly enjoyed them. Not once during a 5K did I ever think that it was hard. This weekend, when I hit mile 5, with 1.2 miles to go, and most of that uphill, I felt that it was hard, in a "I'm not going to finish, I need to stop and throw up on the side of the road" hard.

But I finished, I kept going, I didn't throw up. Maybe this sounds cheesy or silly, but the people lining the course, who called out words of encouragement and motivation, helped so much. Having people call out "Way to stay strong!" and "You've got this!" helped me continue to run when really I just wanted to stop.

During the last year of running, I've had moments where I've become very discouraged. I haven't lost any weight. I haven't become significantly faster; it's rare that I run a mile under 11 minutes, and only once have I done a sub 10 minute mile. My distance has been slow to improve. Last year, I thought for sure I would run a marathon some day. Now even a half marathon feels undoable.

I know that I shouldn't let things like that discourage me. The number on the scale shouldn't be important. The only one I should compare myself to is my old self. And I do feel healthier. I have more energy. I'm better at keeping up with my boys. My resting heart rate is now in the 50s. All signs that I have become healthier. But it would be nice to have more to show from all the 5 am runs.

Finished a 10K is the first thing in a while that has felt like real progress, even with my pace being right at that 11 minute mile. Even with the fact that I can't feel my legs today.

I'm not sure what the next step is from here. Another 10K, but try to improve my time? A half marathon? I haven't decided. The one thing I know is that I'll keep going. I'll keep waking up in the dark mornings to run on my treadmill. I'll keep bundling up both myself and Duck up and run with the jogging stroller. 

I'll just keep running.