Monday, March 21, 2011

Grown Up

When do you start being a grown-up? I keep thinking that surely I've passed that magical, invisible, but certainly real mile marker in my life. The one that separates childhood from adulthood, youth from age, naivety from experience. After all, I remember times in my life when I thought that 10 was so grown up, 16 was mature, 21 was unimaginable, and 29...well, 29 was just down right ancient.

Except that I'm 29 today. And I'm beginning to wonder if I'm actually grown up. I've managed to do a lot of grown up things, I guess. I'm married, I've moved across country, I've got a job, I've had two children, I've bought a house. And I'm now 29.

So for all intents and purposes, I can see no reason why I'm not a grown up. Except that I don't feel like one.

Most days, it just feels like I'm winging this whole thing. Making it up as I go along. And nearly every day, the more I've supposedly accomplished with my life, feeling younger, less experienced, and decidedly less grown up.

I'm starting to think that maybe there isn't a magical ribbon that you run though at the end of childhood, standing there cheering while someone places the award of adult around your neck. Maybe there isn't a certain age where suddenly, I stop feeling like a child in my own life and start feeling like the one in charge. Maybe there isn't this mystical point where everyone stops commenting about how very young I am.

Or maybe there is. Maybe next year. Because surely 30 is finally grown up.


  1. Stopping by from SITS. I sure don't feel like a grown-up either. Some days I sure don't want the responsibilities of one either, but I'm still loving the journey.

  2. I'm 39, and I still don't feel like a grown up! Maybe 40 is the magic number?

    Anyway, happy birthday!

  3. I'm 30 and don't feel grown up either. Although, we are putting an addition on our house right now... I feel like that is something only adults do (remodel). it is weird that I am the person doing it.

    Happy birthday!

  4. I'm 46 and have my moments of not feeling like an adult. I don't think the "big 5-0" will change that either.

  5. My 30th is coming up this year, and I have accomplished far less than you. So you are not alone my friend, I think all adults feel young we just make occasional adult decisions. I think on my deathbed I'll say I'm grown up.

  6. This is a great post and so well written. I have to agree with everyone else here. I'm 47 and I wonder the same thing fairly frequently. I suppose that's a good thing. Inside we are still the same person we always were. We're just growing and changing is all. To the outside world you are most definitely an adult with adult responsibilities and accomplishments. But to yourself, you are just you - the same person you've always been.

    Happy Birthday! I hope you have a wonderful day.

  7. Happy Birthday!

    You stole my post. I actually have the beginning of one that says the exact same thing. But it's probably better that you beat me to it because I'm pretty sure I wouldn't say it nearly as well.

  8. Happy Birthday! I'm sorry I'm a day late!

    I always thought I'd be grown up when I got married and had kids. Now I'm 34 and there's not a husband or a kid to be found. I don't know.

    I decided I was a grown up the day I had my own Costco card.

  9. Happy Birthday!! Oh my, I'm almost 10 years older than I guess that's when you start feeling like a grown up. You've got several years to relish in your not so grown up days. I think for me...the wrinkles clenched it.

  10. I think there are various stages of growing up and we never really stop doing it. :)

    Thanks for visiting my blog on Monday...I appreciate it!

  11. Happy 29th birthday. I hope the day is fantastic.