Dear Mini Van,
I know that I've spent many years ridiculing you and how you represent the stereotypical large family, with a crazy stay at home soccer mom, a back windshield plastered with a stick figure family, and toys falling out of every door. Previously, with my two kids, I was snobby about my non-mini van family. Now, with everyone all cramped together, car seats galore, and climbing over the seats and each other, you sure are looking good.
New mother of THREE
Congratulations on making it to the Super Bowl. It's been a very long time. (Although I would have loved this moment even more if you had stuck with Alex Smith.) Now please, please, please, for Hubster's sake (and by extension, all of ours), continue your perfect Super Bowl record and win tonight.
A fan by marriage
Dear SUV, DVD player, desk top computer, oven, iPhone charger, garage door opener, hot water heater, and kitchen chair,
Please stop breaking.
Homeowner without unlimited income
We've spent a lot of time together over the last four years. It's been a rocky relationship. I'm sure that at some point, I'll be able to look back and realize all the things you did for me. That's I'm a better person because of you. Today is not that day. It's not me, it's you. You can't get done with fast enough.
Counting down the days
You are getting cuter every day. Could you just not grow up quite so fast?
Your absolutely smitten mother
Could you please stop having so many wonderful things on you? Boards are in July, and that study book isn't going to read itself. But with every thing on The Onion, and Slate, and Facebook, and blogs and Pinterest, and YouTube, it may have to.
Someone who clearly isn't studying right now
Dear Baby Fat,
I hate you.
Someone who doesn't even remember her pre-pregnancy body