Sunday, May 9, 2010

The Last Eight Years

Growing up, I wasn't sure how much I wanted to be a parent. I was pretty sure that I wanted kids, at some point. But I had big plans, and wanted to do so much, that initially any thoughts of being a mother were not a priority.

Even after Hubster and I decided to start our family, and I was pregnant with Bug, I had my own views on motherhood. Yes, I wanted to be a mom. But I wasn't going to let it get in my way, slow me down, or hinder me in anyway.

Those were my initial thoughts on being a mom...

Until 4:54 am, on a early summer morning nearly 8 years ago.

Holding my newborn son tight, tears running down my face, I felt every tie I had to anything else loosen. Every pull in other directions weaken. All my priorities, hopes, future plans... everything fell to pieces and reformed into the face of my son.

That pull only strengthened on a late summer afternoon 4 years later, when Monkey was born.

The love I have for these two boys surprises me nearly every day. Everything I do, it's really for them. All my hopes and plans are no longer for me, but for them.

I'm not the perfect parent, not by any means. I scold, yell, lose patience more than I should. I'm gone more than I want.

If I really think about it, it wasn't that my thoughts and feelings about motherhood changed. It was me. I changed when these children entered my life.

The last eight years have changed me. They have challenged me, frustrated me, exhausted me, and delighted me. They have been full of fatigue, long nights, temper tantrums, mile stones, bedtime stories, birthdays, and joy.

I'm grateful each day.


  1. Such a sweet post, I'm crying!

    Happy Mother's Day! I hope you're having a great one.

  2. Thank you for stopping by my blog. Your post really touched me. It is so true the way being a mom challenges and changes us. i would not trade it for the world.
    P.S. We LOVE The Secret garden, we've read it and listened to it on audio several times. It's an all time favorite at our house!

  3. This is a beautiful post. Love, love, love it.

  4. Happy Mother's Day, Katherine!

    Such a beautiful post!

  5. He he I wrote about being a mom too. I think it is funny that we went into motherhood with such different perspective. But in the end we came to the same conclusion. Our kids are the Best thing to ever happen to us- now if we could just spend less time working and spend more time with them right??
    Happy Mothers Day and Good Luck to your hubby on his exam!!

  6. You pretty much hit the nail on the head. I saw so much of myself in this post I can hardly stand it.

    "I'm not the perfect parent, not by any means. I scold, yell, lose patience more than I should. I'm gone more than I want." - Just one of the many ideas in this post that hit home. Thank you for sharing it.

    Happy Mothers Day.

  7. Happy Mother's Day! Those two precious boys are so blessed to have you as their mom.

    This post is just right...I always knew there was nothing in life that I wanted more than to be a Mom, but once it happens it transforms you and there is no going back. I am amazed daily by my children.

    Amazed at their intelligence, their innocence, their smiles and laughter, their unconditional love...

    I am far from the perfect parent, but every night when I go to bed, I pray to be a better parent the next day because those two sweet children sleeping upstairs are my entire world!

    I hope you enjoyed your special day and those three precious men in your life showed you just how much they LOVE you.

  8. What a beautifully written and touching post! There is nothing in the world like the transformative power of motherhood.

    It's so ironic to stumble across your blog today via SITS, because my own post yesterday was on how motherhood has changed me.

    So glad I found your blog and got to read this. Hope you had a wonderful Mother's Day.

  9. What a sweet post. I loved seeing your boys as babies and then the more recent picture. I never knew I wanted kids until I had them.

  10. Now you know how very much you are loved! Every added year changes and grows to that. Happy, Happy Mother's Day!

  11. Thanks for sharing and renewing those precious days! Being a grandmother is sweet twice over! How i love those precious boys, and that wonderful man who completed the circle! Heaven bless. How was the DAT? Thinking of you..