10

Dear Bug,

Now you are 10. 

I'm still reeling at this fact.  How has the time gone so quickly?  How can you possibly be 10? 

I'm still so new at this whole thing, this whole being a parent thing, that it doesn't feel possible that I'm actually not new at it, that I have been doing this for 10 years.  Although, in my defense, every thing with you is new.  You are the front runner, the ground breaker for this whole little thing we call our family.

I look at you, bright blue eyes and freckles, and think that I love you more at age 10 that I have ever loved you.

There are parts of you that are so much older than 10.  Your sarcasm, your responsibility, your thoughtfulness.  You have always seemed so much older than your age in your reserve and your insight.

There are also parts of you that are so much younger than 10. Your timidity, your hesitation. 

I'm sure that the parts of you that are older and the parts of you that are younger all even out to be the amazing 10 year old that you are.

I wanted to throw you a huge, friend filled birthday party, full of sleeping over, movies, games, and pizza. But when I started going over invitations and plans with you, I noticed that you were hesitant. This hesitation grew and grew.  Finally, I stopped and, honestly, for the first time, asked you what you wanted for your birthday.  Your answer? 

"I just want to spend it with my family."

All at once, you sent me into the typical parental emotional ocean: I was both so touched and happy that you felt this way and so concerned that you didn't want to have your friends over.

But I let you have what you want.  And it was a wonderful day.  It's not the average 10 year old boy that requests steak and roasted asparagus for his birthday dinner.

We decided to surprise our budding scientist/explorer with a telescope.  And since you absolutely refused to choose a theme or request a specific cake, I decided to base the whole small family party around outer space. We covered the ceiling with blue, silver, and black balloons.

 I pushed my meager cake decorating skills to the limit by attempting to make a outer space decorated fondant covered cake (I've only used fondant once before.)  And while the cake may not have been close to perfect...

...your reaction was.

So here we are, a full decade later, both of us wondering what is in store.  I'm sure whatever it is, it will be amazing, just like you.

Happy Birthday, Bug!

Love,
Mom